Probably you will associate a trigger with a firearm more than anything else. The trigger that I’m talking about is not so different though. The only difference is this trigger belongs to you and someone else has the power to pull it. I’m talking about the “Emotional Trigger”. A tool of manipulation, that in wrong hands will put you through prolonged depression. You will fall into the trap of guilt and choke in it. Let me picture this for you. Picture yourself with a gun. Imagine a person in front of you lifts your hand and points the barrel at him/herself. Now while that person constantly pushes your finger so that you will shoot, you try your best to not to do so. At last you fail. Now the gun has fired, only in this case the person is not dead. Now the entire fight will boil down to questions like “Why do you have gun?”/”How could you shoot?”. The ultimate goal of such an act is to push a guilt feeling through your throat. And this is a conscious/unconscious strategy by another person to come over their own guilt that they are not able to process in a healthy way. This can run endlessly, like an eternal loop of anarchy. You begin to live a life of constant provocation-outburst-apology. The more you try to get out of it the more it sucks you in.
In your mind you are doing this to save something or fix something. What you do not realize is the kind of damage you do to yourself. You will be at a much better space if you understand the process.
1. You need to have passion for anything you do. And if you have an ounce of passion in you, you will definitely have some triggers.
2. You need to keep the triggers deep inside you. Or in other words you need to be thick-skinned. Mostly only you should be able to reach them and use them.
1. The closest people to you often get to know your triggers. It can be a subject, it can be a feeling, it even can be a food item 😉 Always be very careful about who you keep close.
2. All of this act happens while your rational brain is sleeping. But if you know how it works, you can prevent it. Call a spade a spade! If you constantly feel provoked, in black & white say that it is annoying you. Most of the times if the cat is out of the bag, the act stops right there.
In the end you have to decide how long you want to struggle. This is a personal preference that depends on the value of the person in your life and the time you are willing to spend on it. Weeks, months, sometimes years but at some point you have to draw the line.